Daily News Shots, 03/10/2010

Unemployment rose in 30 states during the month of January according to the US Labor Department. The few gains that were made were cancelled out by the numbers of rising unemployment rates. President Obama still believes he has lowered the unemployement rate and saved the middle class.

Harry Reid fired back at RNC donors who caricatured him as cartoon character Scooby-Doo, making light of the joke by saying, “he solved mysteries and caught the bad guys, pretty impressive — especially for a dog.” Obama immediately offered Harry “If We Don’t Pass This NOW” Reid a scooby snack and a pat on the head as he continued, “using fear to motivate supporters is cowardly politics.”

Colleen LaRose, better known on the internet as JihadJane, was arrested by federal agents for helping to recruit Muslims and supporters for murder. In June of 2008, LaRose posted on YouTube that she was desperate to help suffering Muslims and was immediately tagged to help recruit killers as her race, caucasian, would make her a least-likely suspect in Europe and the United States. LaRose was on track to recruit killers to actually succeed this time in offing Swedish cartoonist Lars Vilks for his caricature of the Prophet Mohammed as a dog (previous attempts by Nigerians wielding axes to break in and kill Vilks, despite laws forbidding citizens from owning guns in Sweden, had failed). Janet “Man-Made Disaster” Napolitano is expected to deliver a denial of terrorism later in the week. The religion of peace had no comment.

Vice President Joe Biden toured several areas on the West Bank with Palestinian prime minister Salam Fayyad after chastising Israel for planning to expand an East Jerusalem housing settlement. He said today that Palestinians deserved a “viable state”. Jordan, home to all but those Palestinians still trying to destroy Israel, remained strangely silent on the issue.

Democrats in Washington have decided to ban earmarks for private contractors, a.k.a. “no-bid contracts.” Obama had campaigned on multiple promises, among them that he would not allow the no-bid contract practice to continue. In the past year he has defied this promise by awarding multiple no-bid contracts to well-connected friends. Democrats acted where Obama simply spoke but have not yet decided whether to agree on repealing the military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy.

Finally, child actor Corey Haim is dead at age 38. He is known for movies such as “The Lost Boys,” “License to Drive,” “Lucas” and telling Larry King Live in 2007 that he was a “chronic relapser.”

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